We Got the FUNK: December 2011

Saturday, December 31, 2011

Learning a new trick

Potty training!!! At least he sat on the toilet long enough to take a picture this time.

Friday, December 30, 2011

My god I think I am dying...and so is the family

Let me just say that I adore and love my husband, but I HATE his GERMS!

Case in point, last week Jason came down with something close to the plague I am sure of it. I typically can fight off any infection, however, my body is under stress and combine stress with an already weak immune system and WWIII kicks in full force.

So my body has been at war with this crappy virus for 3 days and I have never felt this sick.

So here I sit wasting water and causing a probable mold issue in my kids bathroom as I steam it up in an effort to clear the congestion. Humidifiers just don't work for me.

Oh and to add to my cold Eyan also got hit with a double whammy! Stomach flu and this beast of a virus!

Yay us!

Thursday, December 29, 2011

The wait

So it's been a week since I got the news that there has been no fetal growth and a very low heart rate. I am floored by the amount of support and quiet, comforting personal experiences similar to my own. I thank everyone who has reached out to me on Facebook and on this blog! It means a lot. I am glad I spoke out and shared my anger. I feel like miscarriage is something that many women do not talk about. Everyone has their own reasons, but for me speaking out is helping the healing. I hope that other women continue to share their stories in their own ways.


We are still waiting to miscarry. The HCG in my blood stream is still at a high enough level that the miscarriage hasn't happened, but with two extensive talks with my doctors, I have been assured that there really is no hope and that it should be no more than two weeks before my body does what it is supposed to do. It is sad to say, but I am ready for this long emotional roller coaster to end. I have been "pregnant" for "9 weeks" and my emotions have been on high alert the entire time. It is a hard place to be. At this point I have made my peace, prayed for the soul of this angel baby, and began to try to live my normal life.

I will keep you posted. Thank you again for your support.

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Need a good New Year

Please send prayers our way for a better new year! As you can tell this year was tough and I can only pray that the turn of the new year is much more positive and promising.

Saturday, December 24, 2011

Tough Times

My lord, life has been very challenging these past couple weeks. Many people are wondering what the heck is going on? Why are you so sad?  Well many things have brought me down and really made me question what the heck I did to deserve some of this terrible stuff.

So let's start at the beginning...of the year that is.  January should have been full of hope and love, but I spent the first week of January helping to plan my great-grandmothers funeral and digesting the fact that yet another person I cherished has passed on.  Jason ended up getting laid off from work sometime in February and furiously looked for jobs.  In April he still was not working and I was working in what I referred to as "hell."  Life was not happy.  Our marriage was struggling for many reasons, but mainly because we just plain stopped communicating after his mom passed and Eyan was born.  We went to counseling and worked through our communication block to come out stronger and with more love and appreciation for each other than we had.  We took a small vacation to Vegas with some family and had a nice time and things were looking up.  Jason got a job and we were happy. 

That is until more people/animals I cherished were called to heaven.  Our dear pup Jade died very tragically and unexpectedly in May of finals week, then followed my dearest Aunt Nancy.  This woman meant a great deal to me and played a huge part in my upbringing and my life.  Many of my youngest memories are with Nancy and Jen (Eyans babysitter now)!  Nancy was beating cancer, she had all but been cured when out of no where came a brain tumor that in 14 days took her from her family and my life forever.  I spent many of the last days with Nancy and her family, just trying to cope with the fact that she really was going to heaven and I was going to have to say goodbye to another women who played a huge part in my life. Shortly after Jason lost his aunt Chrissy to an awful disease.

A few months went by and things were looking up, I landed a position at a new school that has been very positive for me and my family, Eyan was getting funnier and cuter by the day and Jason and I were doing very well.  That is until Halloween weekend.  A very dear friend of our family passed away very suddenly.  Linda was truly and amazing woman, she loved life and her friends and family.  Not even a week later, I got news through Facebook that a friend of mine was murdered in his home.  What the HECK!  I had just chatted with him the other day?!?  This angered me to no end, regardless of circumstances, the only entity that should take life is God.  They caught the murderer, but still a void was left.  Then out of no where came the passing of my Aunt Kelly.  In a week, I said goodbye to all three people and was left with a lot of questions and sadness.

I spent the next couple weeks preparing for the end of semester and gearing up for the holidays all while digesting all the deaths.  Thanksgiving week was a very surprising week for us.  Turns out that even though the hubby and I were trying to avoid getting pregnant we succeeded and on Tuesday the 22nd of November after my neighbor jokingly asked if I was pregnant, I decided that maybe I should take a test.  I was feeling a bit "weird" but nothing too out of the ordinary.  What the heck, I took a test and low and behold we had a faint positive show up.  I followed that test up early the next morning and again there was a positive staring me in the face.

I was so scared, and sad, and happy and just all these crazy emotions.  I wasn't sure if we were ready for another baby; Eyan is still so much of a baby to me and I didn't want to take that time away from him.  We had planned on waiting about another year before TTC, but low and behold I was pregnant and we had some planning to do.  We had not planned on telling many people, I wanted to tell my mom and my aunt and then try my best to keep it a secret for the next several weeks.  Then came Thanksgiving, where my dad just couldn't leave well enough alone and he told the family.  At that point I gave in too and started confessing my secret to many close friends and family members.  I was starting to get SO excited, but it was early and I had already had one miscarriage prior to Eyan so of course my nerves were on edge.

I went through the next couple weeks feeling fine, no real symptoms except I was moody and a bit more tired than normal.  I kept waiting for the dreadful morning sickness to happen all while having this sinking feeling in my tummy that something just wasn't right.  On December 15th I started spotting and it was not normal in any way.  I knew that something was wrong and that I was losing the pregnancy.  I rushed to my doctor, had my blood ran and got an ultrasound.  The ultrasound did not seem very promising, the technician was very somber and did not give me a whole lot of hope.  She pointed out a yolk sac, a fetal pole and said that there was possibly some cardiac activity, but she couldn't diagnose it and I would need to wait for the radiologist to make the final determination.  She also told me that I was measuring a week off my dates.  I knew right away that there should have been a strong heartbeat and that my dates were pretty iron clad.  At this point I should have been 7 weeks not 6.  I waited all last weekend for my doctor to call me with my blood and ultrasound results.  Monday my doctor called, with what seemed like good news.  My HCG levels were over 26,000 and the radiologist measured a heartbeat of 81bpm (low but promising).  My doctor also told me that the reason I was spotting was because a cyst on my ovary ruptured (until this point I had no idea or history of cysts).  She had me come in for more blood work to compare the first results to and just make sure everything was progressing ok, so on Wednesday I went in.  Early Thursday morning I got a phone call that my HCG levels had only increased by 10,000 in a week, which is not good and that they wanted to schedule another ultrasound.  So in I went, with a dim outlook and knowing full well what I was about to learn.  The ultrasound was somewhat painful, and I just knew it wasn't good.  I waited for the doctor to talk to me and give me the grim news that the baby had died.

My doctor told me that the results were still inconclusive.  There was still a fetus in there and although it showed very little growth, it still had a very low heartbeat (about 50bpm) and that I would need to go back in next week to do more blood work.  So here I sit, angry at the world, knowing full well that this baby is dying and that I am just waiting to miscarry.  There really is no hope and although some people are optimistic and sure that since there is a heartbeat everything will be fine, I know better.  I am very intuitive and I know when things are not right and I am very confident that this baby is dying (if not already dead).  I am broken, and so sad.  I am angry at God and the world.  I don't understand why Jason and I are being showered with death and suffering?  What the heck did we do to deserve this?  In three years we have lost 9 influential people, 1 dog and 2 angel babies.  This just cannot be right.  I feel like I am the grim reaper and that anyone I get close to is going to die.

So this gets better.  Jason has been tired and just fighting off some virus lately.  He went to the doctor on Thursday and was gone for almost 2 hours which was really weird.  I called him as he was leaving the doctors office only to find out that he does have a virus and that they also think something is majorly wrong with his heart.  His pulse was over 130 the 3 different times they checked it.  They hooked him up to a EKG and the preliminary results didn't give much information as to why his pulse was so high.  They took blood and sent him home to rest.  (I was less than nice to him, I was still so angry that we were losing another baby that although I was scared about what he was going through, I didn't have any comforting words for him.)

We got the blood results the next day.  His white blood cell was low (that is what they originally told us, only to turn around and say it was high...I still have no clarification on this). Regardless, his white blood cells were out of whack.  They prescribed him an antibiotic, ordered a machine that he has to wear on his heart and told him he wasn't allowed to work until they figured out what was going on.  This posed another huge problem, we rely on Jason's check and not having that income is very scary, our reserves are running low and I am so scared that we are not going to make it.

So here we sit.  So much unknown, so much anger, so much waiting, just so much.  I don't know what to do.  I have lost hope, faith and any holiday spirit that I should have.  I am mad at anyone that is pregnant right now, and that is terrible.  I should be happy for them, but I just do not understand why everyone else gets to have these happy, healthy, uncomplicated pregnancies and every single time I have been pregnant I have either miscarried or barely lived through it.  It is just plain bullshit to me.  I understand the concept of loss, I understand that I need to cherish the time I spend with people because in the blink of an eye life can change and they can be gone.  I get this.  I know that children are an extreme blessing and that every day that I get to be Eyan's mommy is an even better day than the last.  So what the hell is God trying to teach me?

Have any ideas?

Christmas Eve...This is my reason for loving Jesus

Because he answered my prayers and blessed me with my perfect little ninja!

I decided to do a hodge podge post of funny pictures of my little man that I really should have posted while I was on my hiatus!  Below is some pictures from the last couple weeks.  Today I am spending time with my family and watching Christmas movies with this perfect little blessing!

Love him!
He looks SO grown up here

hahaha!  Dart Gun!  He loves these Nerf Toys

He really is a rock star

So serious!

Where's Eyan?

Here he IS!



Argh!  This is Eyan trying to raise his eyebrows!

happy!

Reading time

Learning to say "CHEESE!"

Jesus is the reason for the season!  What an amazing blessing he sent me, I cherish this monster every day...even on the days that he really is a monster!  I am lucky to be his mommy!

Friday, December 23, 2011

Cleaning?

I love cleaning!  I know its weird.  I really love having a clean house and one that smells good.  Plus I have allergies and get super super sinus infections when my house is dirty.

Eyan apparently does too?  I started cleaning the other night and he insisted on helping, even though I had Mickey Mouse and other fun stuff for him to do.  He got his handy dandy squirt bottle and wipe and went to it.  I promise I did not ask him to do that and a bath immediately happened!
I'm ready mom!

Gotta get the wipe wet

Ewww!  Cleaning the toilet!  Luckily no one uses this bathroom!

Seriously Mom!  I am busy

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Snow Dogs

The pups love the snow.  If it snows, they absolutely must be outside for hours, frolicking and eating it!

Mia in the snow

Eyan watching the pups play

Lily and Mia watching the neighbor dogs play too!

Lily stocking Mia!
Do your dogs love the snow too?

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Y3W: Needs a Haircut!


This boys hair grows like crazy...think its time for a cut?
PS: He got his hair wet with the dog water...amazing!

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Discovering the Great Outdoors

All mommies have those moments where you look at your toddler and can't help but laugh at how silly they are.  I unfortunately did not get to see this happen at the exact moment but was graced with a re-do of Eyan's new discovery when I went to pick him up after work.  

Eyan loves being outside, and on this particular day, learned that the sliding glass window can do funny things with your face!

I have no clue why he is holding the license plate...Mug Shot?

This little piggy went to market

Smoosh

Also it is very important that he shovels the...well I'm not sure what

This is what he looks like when the great outdoors are kept outdoors!

This post is brought to you by: 

Monday, December 19, 2011

Meet Gus & Wyatt

Meet Gus!  Gus is an adorable service dog in training.  For the life of me I cannot remember exactly what type of retriever he is, but he is SO damn cute and smart!


Meet Wyatt!  Wyatt is a 2 year old perfect little boy who just happens to suffer from epilepsy.  If you have followed my blog, you have read a little about Wyatt.  Wyatt had is first grand mal seizure just after is 2nd birthday and from that point his parents have done everything possible to help Wyatt be able to life a happy productive life.


Meet Wyatt & Gus!  Gus came to Wyatt through a foundation that helps train service dogs for epileptic patients.  Gus is still a puppy and needs A LOT of training.  These pictures are from one of the awesome events Wyatt's family and friends planned.  It was a wonderful silent auction and spaghetti dinner.  They managed to raise a good portion of money to pay for Gus and his training, but are still in need of donations to help offset the costs of Gus' $8000.00 price tag!


 The dinner and silent auction was awesome, it was beautifully set up and check out all of the angel orbs surrounding this event!


Wyatt and Eyan and Jason!  The boys are Best Friends and just LOVE hanging out with each other!


If you would like to donate to Wyatt and Gus, please let me know and I will get you my address to mail the donation.  Wyatt lives directly across the street from me so I can walk over the donation at any point. 



Sunday, December 18, 2011

Christmas is coming, Christmas is coming!

The goose is getting fat...ehhh I don't remember the rest of the song, but seriously Christmas is Coming!

We have a lot of family traditions that we make sure to do every year and although I totally spaced out the camera on a few, I did remember to snap some!

Duh...The tree!  We decorate it as a family every year! 
A visit to Bass Pro Shops for Santa...and a #free Carousal ride!

Free Santa photo...my kid LOVES santa

We didn't ask for this, Santa did...so weird, but whatever

Other things we have done that I have totally forgot to snap pictures of:
  1. Denver Zoo Lights!  We have NEVER missed a year since the beginning, I can tell you which animated lights are new and which ones are missing.  Eyan loved the zoo lights this year and kept going "oh oh oh" when he saw a particular lighted animal that he loved.  I can't believe I forgot to take pictures.  Lame mom moment!
  2. Jason loves to find new ideas for decorating our house.  I posted a picture a couple weeks ago of what our house looks like at Christmas.  Every year Jason gets $100.00 extra to spend on lights or whatever he wants for the outdoor Christmas display, so a MUST is to pack up our little family, dogs and all and drive all over looking at awesome Christmas displays.  Eyan fell asleep and of course I forgot to take a picture. 
Other things we have left to do:
  1. Watch Christmas Movies
  2. Open the Christmas Eve PJ's
  3. Spend time with family
  4. Open Christmas Presents and Enjoy a great family day!
Merry Ho Ho!

Saturday, December 17, 2011

Funny Funny

Oh the weather outside is delightful!  Sunny and 37, which in Colorado in December is actually pretty nice!  This week has been beyond crazy and emotional for myself and my family.  Many people know what I am talking about and those that do not, will soon enough.  It is a crazy busy story.

So at a time in my life when things are insanely crazy and I am just bursting at the seems with stress from work, family, and the holidays, I better find something to laugh about.  I love this blog hop, so LINK UP!
Although I only have one funny...So here goes...

I am a huge "potty mouth."  What can I say, I enjoy a little vulgarity and expressing my emotions and although I have been seriously trying to edit my vulgar little mouth, I am apparently not doing the best job.

Case in point...Eyan is a repeater and KNOWS what words he really shouldn't repeat.  I was yelling at the dogs because they were barking over nothing and I had a headache and was in the midst of finals.  So after yelling at them and telling them to stop, I finally yelled "Shut the fuck up!"  Eyan proudly repeated "Fuck UP!"  I tried my best not to laugh, really tried, but I just couldn't.  I burst out laughing and he said it again.  I tried to correct him and say no no its "FUNK up!"  He knew better.  He only said it a couple times, but many should I win mom of the year again.

I did decide to make a new years resolution to stop the vulgarity and cussing and save it for only special occasions from this little situation.  But it was still seriously funny!

So what have you said around your kids only to have them repeat it???

Monday, December 12, 2011

Quick Hiatus

Hey 16 followers :)

I am going to take a week hiatus from blogging.  This is one of my busy weeks with high school finals hitting and final grades being due.  I will be back next week.

Until then thanks for following and have a wonderful week!  I promise LOTS of updates next week!

Thursday, December 8, 2011

Feeling Better

This past couple weeks has been tough, but I just wanted to update and say that I am feeling better.  Eyan and I are learning to work through the tantrums with minimum hitting and I am hoping that the rest of my semester goes off without a hitch at work.

Have a great Thursday!

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Ever Just Feel Like a Shitty Person?

Well I sure do!

Lately my beautiful little baby boy seems to hate his mother, and I am struggling with this as a first time mother.   Eyan is the typical spoiled toddler and only child at this point.  He throws tantrums and is teething (F-U Canine teeth!) and is a picky eater and is always loud.  I love him, don't get me wrong, but there have been days where all I wanted to do was go back to a time before I had kids, before I was so busy and when life was simple.  I have had a few more of those days lately.

Eyan is hitting me, and I am sure at this point that he hates his mother.  He sometimes just walks up to me and slaps me in the face because he wants candy--*thanks mom*.  It is like his way of getting attention.  I have no idea what to do with this.  I have tried ignoring it, fake crying, spanking, time-out and sternly speaking to him. Nothing has helped.  I have no clue what to do and I just feel shitty.

Sunday night was by far the worst in a while.  I had been up early with the baby Sunday morning, and spent all day playing and hanging out.  He was quite tantrumy and his teeth have really been bothering him.  My mom wanted to run to a dept store to do some shopping at around 7 Sunday night and we were planning on taking Eyan.  When we started to get in the car he lost his mind and would not let us buckle him in the seat, so I grabbed him and put him back in the house and told my husband to get him ready for bed, I would be home in a little bit.  My wonderful hubby did just that and when I got home a little later, Eyan was "sound" asleep in his room.  I went in to check on him and then jumped in the shower and started to prepare for my week.  About 40 mins later Eyan started crying, I went in and soothed him and he went back to sleep.  This happened over and over again until I finally gave in around 11:30 pm (I have to be up at 5 for work) and brought him into bed.  That was a huge mistake, everytime he rolled or moved or I moved or Jason moved he just started crying and kicking (very very hard).  At 2:30 I had it.  I was so tired and so tired of the "beatings" my child was giving me.  I literally have 20 bruises on my legs from him kicking me so hard. I picked him up, began to cry and tell him that I was sorry and I didn't know what he wanted.  He just needed to stop, and mommy needed to sleep.  I told him that enough was enough and he was sleeping in his bed.  I placed him in his bed, gave him his sippy cup and went to lay down.  He screamed bloody murder for a good 2 minutes before I couldn't take that anymore and finally woke my husband up and made him help me.  Jason got more milk for Eyan and I picked him up and rocked him to sleep.  Finally at 3:15 my house was quiet and I was bawling and unable to go to sleep.

Yesterday, Eyan was apparently wonderful for his grandma and Jen and when I got him he became a tantrum throwing, hitting toddler again who continued to just hit on my every nerve and my lack of sleep from the night before.  I am at my wits end with this behavior!  HELP people!

The second part to my shitty person is that I wronged a friend totally accidentally and I think I got her in trouble at work.  Man do I feel awful, I care a lot about my friendships and I value them and to think that I made her think that I was sneaky and untrustworthy is awful.  It was a total accident and although her husband assured me that it was not a big deal, I totally feel like I messed things up between all of us.  I hope that they understand that I never ever meant to mess up things with her.

The last part is that I have been feeling the need to allow my hormones to say whatever they want to my husband.  Although he totally understands my insane state as of right now I know that some of what I say doesn't come across right and that I really need to be aware of how I approach certain situations.

So there it is...I am a terrible mommy, friend and wife right now.  My insanity has a good reason, but boy I cannot wait until I return to normalcy.

Sunday, December 4, 2011

More followers?

I need more followers!  I know you are out there!  I know you have been reading my blog.  I have seen the statistics of people that are stopping by, so just go over to the left and click to join!

Also, what types of things would you like to see on the blog?  I write a lot about my little ninja, but what things are my readers interested in?  Baby/toddler reviews? Couponing? TTC?  Comment below...

Help people, I can only post so many pictures and silly stories of my Funky family

:)

Saturday, December 3, 2011

Double Whammy--Saturdays Laughs!

I totally forgot that today was Saturday when I scheduled all my blogs this week!

Well I just love The Mommyhood Chronicles and her Saturday Top 5 Laughs Blog Hop!  So here are my top 5 of the last couple weeks!

1. As you see below it is definitely Christmas at our house and the inside is NO exception!  We decorate everything from the kitchen to the bathroom in our house and as soon as I can find a great duvet for our down comforters I am attacking the bedroom!  Anyway, one of the decorations in my house is an animated singing Elmo that Eyan ADORES!  He pushes the button and Elmo comes to life singing a loud variety of Christmas music and my kid goes CRAZY!  He dances and stares at Elmo and is just enthralled.  It is so freaking cute to watch him love Elmo as much as mommy does!

2. I'm hormonal...cause I am a woman.  Sometimes the hubby doesn't understand this.  This week we bought a poinsettia after MANY years of me fighting this "flower" in our house.  I tried to set it off to the side, Jason moved it to the center of the island in our kitchen...I lost my mind on him.  Which is the real funny part.  What woman cries and fights over flowers?  Um this crazy one!  The flower is still hanging our on the kitchen island and I am still annoyed by it.  Vendetta against the poinsettia...I think yes!

3.  Working as a teacher I get a good 5 days off for Thanksgiving and HOLY HECK was it needed.  But alas, all great things must come to an end.  I returned this week to some super silly kids.  One of which asked me the following: "Mrs. Funk, If you only do drugs for like a year does is really do brain damage?"  My reply..."Let me check your test scores."  AHAHAHAHAHA sometimes I am so witty.

4. We got snow in COLORADO can you freaking believe it...yeah me either.  Well, I got an SUV...and no ice scrapper.  Which is hysterical when you totally have iced over windows at work and try to scrap the window with your insurance card (it totally works on dirty dishes).  I am such a dork...and ended up quitting after 5 minutes of being unsuccessful.  I just sat in my car with the defroster running until I had enough window space to see and "safely" drive.

5.  I fell asleep on the couch...per usual lately.  My lovely puppy Lily was sleeping on the love seat.  She started some serious dream where I can only assume she was chasing rabbits.  Anyway she starts barking and freaking out in her dream and I wake up screaming "get it, get it."  Apparently I was in on the dream?  So weird...so funny.

Link up!

Y3W--Christmas Is HERE!

At least at my house it is :)

Link up here:


Friday, December 2, 2011

Thanksgiving

Happy Belated Thanksgiving to all my wonderful readers!

My family has always done Thanksgiving at our family-owned roller skating rink.  It is large enough that everyone can fit comfortably and it has both a house and the rink all attached into one very large building.  We spend the majority of Thanksgiving in house, and later in the afternoon we sometimes journey into the  rink.  Since the majority of us have skated since we were practically born, we tend to skate less and eat more.

Thanksgiving this year was a bit off.  My hubby had worked about 27 hours without sleep and basically showed up to eat and say hi then head to bed for another 8 hour shift later that night.  I was not feeling very well, (more on that later) and Eyan was just going crazy chasing around all his cousins.  I was pretty lame with the camera, but managed to snap some less than perfect pictures on my iphone.

Don't they all look so happy...I think it is nap time

Happy Gobble Gobble

Eyan and MY cousin (his 2nd cousin) Taya
(Eyan is only 6 weeks older than her!)

Isn't she so freaking adorable!

Thursday, December 1, 2011

Sponsor Swap

So I bet you have heard of Censie over at Building Our Story!

Well this month we are swapping buttons and advertising for each other.

Censie writes an awesome blog that has tons of fun giveaways, great information about toddler and baby gear, and adorable updates about her son Jude and their family!  I am a daily visitor to Building our Story and I hope you will be too!

The giveaways are my favorites.  I know Censie personally, and I trust that what she is reviewing and giving away, she truly believes in.  I use many of the same products for Eyan and sometimes go buy toys and other items because Censie suggested them!  I have won 3 giveaways off of her blog, and it is always super easy to enter!

For easier access to Censie's blog, grab her button over on the left side of my page under "Sponsors!"

Or here :)