We Got the FUNK: April 2013

Saturday, April 27, 2013

Laughs...in pics

Yeah, ever just feel like a failure as a parent? Me too! In all seriousness though, these are just funny!

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Back to work...

Ok not entirely.  I am teaching an AP course next year and am elated that I have 25 kids enrolled!  That's huge considering last year only 13 kids signed up and they didn't end up running the course.  So after another year of establishing myself and preparing for this class, it is running with BIG numbers!

So why am I back to work?  Well tomorrow night I have our AP parent night where I meet the kids and parents and hand out summer homework and a tentative syllabus.  Yeah, like I finished that before I went on maternity leave.  It was at the top of my list for like 13 weeks...it really was.  But I had 1,000,000,000 other things to accomplish as well and so I didn't get to it.  Andplusalso, I was fully expecting small numbers again and the course not running again.  So yeah I spent the kids nap, (which they rarely take at the same time and when they do so does mama) writing the summer homework assignment.  My kids have been in bed for 2 hours and I am STILL up writing this syllabus because tomorrow I have a dentist appointment and NO time!  EEK.

Pray for me people, its time to put procrastination to the side (hahaha as I am blogging instead of writing syllabi) and get this done!

Playing with the webcam on my new computer...keeping busy

Monday, April 22, 2013

6 weeks!

Emberlynn is 6 weeks today and mommy is almost skinny!

I believe my total pregnancy weight gain was 25 lbs and I am definitely down that plus a pound! I would love to drop ten more pounds, and be back to my high school weight. However I have been at this same weight for about 3 weeks now so I don't see it just melting off like these pounds did. I might have to attempt a workout...which I loathe more then well most things. Until then ill continue with my current "workout" of nursing and chasing Eyan!

Thursday, April 18, 2013

Last moments

So tonight as I am utterly exhausted from what I can only guess is a growth spurt, where my patience and body is wearing thin, I have to remind myself, these are the last moments I will have where she is so tiny and needs me for everything. Some nights the thought of "I never get to do this again so cherish this" keeps me going.

Emberlynn completes our family. I get the comments of "one of each, how lucky, what a perfect family" all the time. I'm reminded by Jason that he will be getting "fixed" soon. My mom tells me that the most scary thing she ever witnessed was my labor and delivery with Eyan and that I don't need to chance my life for another baby. All of those comments are correct and so I sit here and just breathe in that new baby smell. I take in all her little features and snap a million pictures, I hold her every chance I can because this is the last little baby that will be mine.

We fought so hard to get here; to get this "perfect family." Lost so many loved ones and gained a deeper appreciation for life. 2011 was by far one of the hardest years of my life culminating in the second pregnancy loss that Jason and I had experienced. 2012 surprised us with Emberlynn's pregnancy that was by my standards "perfect." She is a great baby and so regardless of how tired or grumpy I am, I will take in these moments, her features, the sweet snuggles and the way she stares at her big brother. How her first real smile was caused from Eyan kissing her head. My last baby and these last moments are what I live for!

5 laughs

In celebration of my big boys birthday this week, these laughs are dedicated to him!

1. Eyan tells me the other day he is moving in with grandma to Disneyland, "but don't freak out mommy!"

2. Eyans new thing is after he has been to the bathroom to pee he then comes out sits down, contemplates whatever 3 yr olds contemplate and then announces he needs to poop! Makes me laugh so hard because its almost always when Jason has bathroom duty!

3. On Eyans birthday everyone was calling and singing the birthday song, and he just kept singing with everyone an wishing them a happy birthday. Adorable!

4. We have a calendar and stickers to countdown the days to Disney! Every morning Eyan tells me "we forgot something mommy!" Then runs to the fridge and tells me "we need a sticker on my calendar!" His excitement is awesome!

5. The other day Eyan was getting ready to go to my moms for the evening, so he grabbed his "pack back" and ran around stuffing toys in it. Then he asks me what he forgot and I said underwear, socks and clothes. He takes his pack back upstairs to his room puts 4 pair of underwear in it and comes back down to show me. He was so proud I couldn't tell him that the undies might not cut it ;)

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Eyan is 3!

At 10:48am after 18 hours of labor, a failed vacuum attempt and a csection with some scary recovery time for the both of us, my stubborn, perfect, smart little boy entered this world 3 years ago today!

He changed everything about me and made me an even more neurotic loving crazy person. I had never experienced love like I had when he made our family!

Eyan, in this last year you potty trained, started telling jokes, dressing yourself, became a wonderful helper and big brother and continue to amaze us everyday!

I love you so much baby errr big boy!

Happy 3rd birthday!

Monday, April 15, 2013

Raising kids in this world

You know in the last year there have been at least three major tragedies in the US, and each time people begin to post government conspiracies and inspirational thoughts and of course prayers to all affected.

But aren't we all affected? Shouldn't we just be praying for humanity in general instead of only the folks in the immediate vicinity of the horrible tragedies? Of course a special prayer should go out to those folks. But humanity in general needs to be focused on, especially our children.

Raising kids in this world is going to take a whole lot more than inspiration and prayers. Our way of explaining these tragedies to our kids needs to change. Growing up, if something terrible happened, my parents didn't discuss it, they turned off the TVs and kept us entertained and away from it. In this day and age, that is not an option, especially with younger generations having so much access to the Internet.

I read a status on Facebook tonight that simply stated, "don't believe everything you read on the Internet." From working in a high school, I know how quickly things go viral. Kids believe and are fairly gullible. Our parents only had to turn off the TV, we have so much more to turn off. Our kids are increasingly desensitized and are still just as gullible. How do we handle tragedy like this and still maintain our kids innocence? How do we teach them that humanity for the most part is good, when these acts of violence are running rampant in our society? How do we make our kids feel safe when we as adults are all too familiar with how truly unsafe life is?

I'm lost. I'm scared. I'm angry. I'm sad. I need direction. How do I raise my kids in a world full of hateful idiots trying to prove a point? Thoughts...

Breast feeding number 2

3.5 years ago when I made the decision to breast feed Eyan I did it blindly, believing that it would be easy and natural. I heard little talk of no pacifiers or bottles because it would cause nipple confusion. I didn't think about the chances of Eyan going into a NICU or well really anything. At one point my mom gave me a book called "So That's What They're There for." That I skimmed and put on a shelf. I just figured baby would know what to do and I would follow along.

I bought my breast feeding supplies based on what I had observed other successful breast feeding moms use or what was recommended to me. For example Michelle Dugger (the mom who has 19 kids and a TV show on TLC) used a my Brest Friend to nurse her kids and she had a ton so it must be a fantastic item...and it is! My old cheer coach had a nursing cover that had boning at the top so the mommy could see down but no one else could. She recommended that to me even before I was pregnant with Eyan. So I searched for the perfect cover with boning, to this day I still use it. Other than that I really didn't give much thought to any of it.

When Eyan was born he went straight to the NICU, while I went to my own recovery. I didn't give him his first, second or even third bottle. I wasn't even asked. They put a pacifier in his mouth without so much as a consultation with me. I never thought twice about how much that pissed me off until I had to ask to nurse him when he was 2 days old. They just assumed we weren't nursing. Nursing in the hospital was easy as the nurses were all really helpful...plus there is no milk, only colostrum so you are not dealing with engorgement that causes latch issues or huge milk letdown that causes scary choking episodes to new parents or cracked bleeding nipples. Nursing became frustrating when we were finally home and my milk came in and he couldn't latch and I was SO sleep deprived that a bottle was easier. We all think nursing is natural and that the baby will know what to do, no one realizes you both have to learn together and that it is hard hard work! Still I had it in my mind that I was going to nurse him, so I continued to fight and struggle and supplement and finally around 2 months we were breast feeding more than supplementing and I was kinda sleeping. Eyan nursed for a little over 10 months and I was happy with that.

So here we are at round two. I'm a lot more educated, I have all the fancy nursing stuff and experience on my side. I highly doubt nursing is actually cheaper then formula feeding with the cost of nursing bras/tanks, milk storage stuff, nursing pillows, breast pumps, hooter hiders and the like. Although I'm sure you can easily get away without using most of that, but I cannot...it's my nursing safety blanket and what helps me survive. But back to my 2nd time around. Emberlynn is pretty "natural" at nursing...bahaha I laugh at this statement because honestly I had to teach her, she had no clue, no natural instinct to find boob and insert nipple. Several nurses had to check her latch to make sure she was doing it right. Skip to day 2 in the hospital and my milk came in. Those poor nurses had no clue what to do with the amount of milk pouring out of me and Emberlynn was choking and spitting up so much it was scary. I was quickly reminded that nursing is hard and we both had to learn. I forgot how exhausting it is to constantly have a baby attached to you, or how you actually need to eat more than just a few Doritos and your sons Easter candy to keep up with milk production or that you need to watch what you eat because it makes baby gassy and that is a whole other hell. I also got a baby with reflux issues so after she nurses she then spits most of it up then needs to nurse right away and the cycle goes on. Top that off with a little boy that needs his mama and I feel like a first time mom again.

So how's this going? Well the last few days we've been cluster feeding so I'm exhausted and so is this spitty little girl! But overall it is going well. I have not supplemented yet and she is gaining weight and is a decent sleeper for a breast fed baby. Eyan NEVER slept. His longest stretches were 2 hours, but mostly an hour here then up for an hour or two then another hour of sleep then up. Emberlynn has a good 4-5 hour stretch each night typically and then is up every two after that. I'm struggling to find my balance that I'm so used to. I need a clean house and home cooked food and a happy little boy. My house is picked up, not clean (well to my standards anyway). If we have 3 home cooked meals a week were doing good. Last week I had four! My Eyan seems happy but has started fake crying and making bigger deals out of very small injuries. Mama is sad about that and trying to continue to find awesome things to do with him...if only the darn Colorado weather would cooperate as well we could do so much more! But overall we're doing well. I'm finding most of nursing to be easier the second time around and hopefully will make it to the 1 yr mark with her. I'm not opposed to formula and I have some ready to go if I feel the need, but for now I'm exclusively breast feeding and happy.

Sunday, April 14, 2013

Picking up the pace

Hello out there!

I apologize to my friends and followers who have commented on the blog lately an have not received a response! I promise I've read them and LOVE all the responses coming from you all. Today (baring any crazy baby screaming episodes) I plan on responding to as many a I possibly can.

Getting used to two kids is a challenge as I've eluded to and many of you already know. I think when I head back to work in a month I will be able to easily update the blog a lot more! I seriously have tons of pictures and stories to tell!

This weekend we took a quick trip to Grand Junction to visit family.  Eyan and Emberlynn did fantastic in the 6 hour car ride (we did have a few stops to eat and potty breaks too)!  Eyan loved watching his movies on the DVD with the wireless headphones and Emberlynn did fantastic with the altitude and long car ride in the much hated carseat.  After visiting with family, Eyan and daddy took a swim where Jason slipped and fell into the pool.  Thank God that he didn't pull Eyan in with him!  Emberlynn and I just hung out by the pool, exhausted after a long day of traveling and visiting.  Overall, it was a nice quick trip.

Thursday, April 11, 2013

1 Month!

Wow! My baby girl is already 1 month old today. What a whirlwind month it has been. She is a spitfire, bossy, beautiful little girl and we could not be happier to be her parents!

At the docs on Monday they finally diagnosed reflux. Basically a small diet change for me and some antacid medicine for a month or so should help the poor little spitty girl. I have already noticed a difference in 3 days as she is more calm, not screaming and grunting after I feed her and overall a much more pleasant happy baby.

Her 1 month stats:
Weight: 7.13lbs! Up from 6.9 at birth
Height: 20 1/2...yeah still debatable ;)
Head: 13 inches...same as before

I forgot to ask percentile but I'm fairly certain she's in the 50th for weight still and around the 80th for height.

Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Fears on dying in Disney

Yeah you read that correctly! I am seriously so afraid of dying on our upcoming vacation to Disneyland! Why you ask?

1. I hate flying! I used to love it but after an awful flight with some of my favorite derby gals where I'm fairly certain we were caught in a tornado and after being diverted to another airport then having to retake off in that awful storm, I officially hate flying. Add to that the fact that Eyan loves airplanes and continuously talks about them wrecking and their wings falling off...I'm feeling paranoid. Oh and I will have an infant on my lap! A friend of mine who is a flight attendant decided to share with me how dangerous this is if the plane goes down. Well shoot were dying anyway so I guess that's the least of my worries.

2. The lunatic over in North Korea has me freaking out that I am taking my entire family to die in the "Happiest place on Earth!" I don't doubt he is going to send a nuclear weapon over and I can only pray we intercept it with little damage to any ecosystems or lose of life. Ugh I am so over the angry politics of the world. This fear is legitimate as North Korea has told the foreign embassies over there that they cannot guarantee their safety after April 10...so basically any day after the 10th we should expect a nuclear attack! Oh and you know where they are aiming that missile? The west coast because its the closest! Crap seriously crap!

3. So what if an attack happens when I'm there. What if I cannot hold both my babies as we are blasted into oblivion and comfort them? What if for some insane reason my kids live but all the adults in the party die and no one knows who they belong to so they end up in an orphanage eventually being separated and never knowing their family. Yeah that is where this mamas postpartum hormones are right now! I'm losing my freaking mind.

Please people give me some hope and sanity.

Friday, April 5, 2013

State of the Funks

Everyone keeps asking, "how are you guys doing?" "What's life like with two kids?" "Are you getting any sleep?"

Well people at this point almost 4 weeks in we are existing. Everyone is still alive including the dogs and I've had days where I feel like I am super mom/wife, but more often I have days where I'm barely holding it together. For the most part, we are adjusting pretty well. After kid one you have a much more realistic expectation of sleep deprivation, so that aspect is good. Eyan is really doing great with his baby sister and is so gentle with her. Jason has been fantastic with well everything (my hormones, cooking, cleaning, Eyan's bedtime, Eyan in general)

Life with two kids is a challenge. I know it only gets more challenging from here on out when she starts moving so we'll cross that road when we get there. Things I used to be able to do with one kid are nearly impossible with two. Especially because little missy has a need to be held constantly. So cooking is not happening very frequently (boo) and it takes me 3 days to write a blog post because someone is crying or almost peeing their pants or riding the dog or spitting up the entire contents of their insides. But then there are days where I can get emissions and plates on my vehicles without a tantrum.

Sleep in our house has been an ongoing fight. Jason and I bicker more over sleep then any other thing. Since he is back to graveyards, he isn't sleeping well during the day. I am obviously not getting continuous sleep but its not nearly as rough as it was with Eyan. She sleeps fairly consistent 3-4 hour stretches, so I'm getting about 6-8 broken hours of sleep. Basically the only one sleeping is Eyan.

Regardless, these two are worth it and it will get easier!

Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Already 2nd Child Syndrome

So Sunday was Easter right...Everyone was posting their adorable families on Facebook and I was just trying to figure out how to bath myself and get both kids bathed and dressed before one spit up all over everything and the other dove head first into his chocolate Easter bunny.  We had to be in Fort Collins (about an hour drive) by 1:00 so at 10:00am I started getting ready.  I nursed little missy, put on a video for Eyan (mind you Jason had to work so I was doing this all alone) and started my very quick shower.  I am pretty sure I was in the shower for 5 minutes before the baby started screaming, Eyan was bored with his video and Jason was unfortunately woken up.  Regardless, the rest of my attempts of getting out of the house were rough but somehow by the skin of my teeth, I had both kids bathed, dressed and I was looking decent too and we were off.  On my way to pick up my mom, I realized I had forgot to take pictures of the kids together in their Easter outfits...MOMFAIL!  I mentioned this to my mom and she said to just do it later, so I left it at that.

Well of course you have to eat on Easter so Eyan's shirt was covered in ketchup and chocolate (not in the same bite) and Emberlynn needed to be change and proceeded to poop and pee everywhere thereby needing to be changed out of her now soiled Easter dress...and there went my photos.  Immediately I was upset because already my 2nd child was not getting the same photos as her brother for her baby book.  UGH, second child syndrome already started and I have to get a handle on this!  My poor sister hardly has any pictures of herself as a baby and growing up, but me, I have about a zillion.  I don't want this for Emberlynn so I have been very consciously taking tons of photos and making sure that I am talking to her and giving her the same type of attention Eyan received at this point in his little life.  So in an effort to not completely fail at this goal, I washed Emberlynn's outfit and took a couple pictures on Monday.  I will do the same with Eyan later on this week (he was at my moms Monday and we have been slammed with visitors and errands these last couple days).

We did get some tradition stuff done, we colored eggs, had a hunt and did Easter baskets.  My egg hunting pictures were junk, so here is the best of what I remembered to take!
Emberlynn and her 1st Easter basket!

No one will ever know this was taken Monday instead of Sunday :)

My handsome boy coloring his eggs

Emberlynn "coloring eggs"

Love this photo of him!

Me & my kids, slightly tired as this might have been almost 10:00 pm the night before Easter

Easter baskets!

Well I tried ;)